What’s up with me

Hi guys,

I hope everyone has been well. I haven’t posted in ages and the only real excuse I have is that life just gets busy. During winter I was spending a lot of my weekends skiing and when I wasn’t skiing I was helping around the house to help my parents out. I’ve also been working on my own self care as I resigned from my second job two weeks ago and have decided to spend my now abundance of spare time doing things that make me genuinely happy. Things like watching netflix shows, playing with my dogs, going to the gym and reading, just to name a few.

One of the main reasons I’ve decided that I need to practice self care more is that I was recently diagnosed with Scoliosis Kyphosis. For those who don’t want to read the link, its a spinal curve both as a sideways ‘S’ shape and a forward spinal curve. A couple of my vertebrae essentially didn’t form properly, leading to these curves. It’s something that while it has definitely taken a toll on my self confidence, its not that major. The one relief I got out of the whole process was that there was a reason behind my chronic back pain.

Scoliosis is something that is generally spotted at an early age (pre-teen) but was missed with me. I had a specialist tell me that it was missed purely because I have managed to grow a centred torso, whereas a lot of patients will be slightly off to one side. In the words of the surprisingly blunt specialist “You’re quite centred, so I can understand why this has only been spotted at 22, others are quite unaesthetic”.

Those who are diagnosed at a young age can generally stop it from getting any worse, if you’re an adult though its a bit trickier and I was pretty much told that ‘it cant be fully straightened, but it can be prevented from getting any worse’ (yay me!).

I am in no means trying to organise a pity party for myself. I personally believe that admitting your challenges and discussing them with others is a pillar of self care. This is the card I have been dealt and that’s okay. I did a face mask and watched a rom-com, now I’m ready to face this challenge and move on. How are you practicing self care and what does it mean to you?

I’m off to the THIS THAT festival this weekend, hopefully have some nice pics to share then, for the time being enjoy this photo of me before going to Yours & Owls the beginning of October xx

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What I learned about travelling with my best friend

Recently I’ve been in a big mood of reflection, how did I get to where I am and whether I’m happy with the decisions I made to get to where I am. One big turning point in my life was when I decided to go on an overseas trip with my best friend (at the time). I think doing something like that is a huge commitment and also a huge trust exercise.

The whole trip was incredible and I loved every second, even the not so great moments were memorable. I did two tours, both with contiki (incredible). The main thing that I loved about travelling with Contiki was the other travellers I met along the way. At the end of a Contiki tour and I imagine the end of a TopDeck tour as well, they get you to fill out a survey of how you liked your trip and what was your favourite part and each tour I ticked ‘Other travellers’ as one of my highlights.

I met so many incredible people who I will never forget, all for different reasons.

Now, back to the point;

I travelled Europe with my best friend and when you commit to something like that with someone you connect so great with (but not in a romantic way) its a big deal. You book it with the knowledge you’ll probably argue and you try and decipher what would be the best way to conquer it. We decided that just giving each other space until we were over what we were angry about would be the best move however that wasn’t always the case.

Travelling with my best friend taught me that you may not be as similar as you thought you were. This of course isn’t a problem at all however spending so much time together it can be hard because you aren’t always on the same page.

Travelling with your best friend essentially translates to ‘travelling with your non-romantic partner’ you fight like a couple, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that you make up as quickly as a couple. I am quite stubborn, and when I ‘know’ I’m right I won’t necessarily take into consideration what the opposing position has to say. Of course, my best friend knew this trait of mine.

At points of the trip, probably the hardest points for me, we would disagree on things and I could literally see how much this girl was growing to hate me. I’m not sure if I could’ve done one thing different to stop this from happening or what but honestly it was wrenching knowing that someone so important to you was developing such a strong dislike for you that there really was no reversing it.

It’s been nearly two years since this trip and the last time I spoke to this girl wasn’t last Christmas, but the Christmas before, and it wasn’t pleasant. I often think about how our friendship ended on many unanswered questions and how it ended on bad blood and essentially a divided friendship group. I don’t regret not being friends with this girl, but I regret how so many people managed to get involved and left many people not speaking.

Knowing this girl, it’s typical of her to want to make our break of friendship as public as possible. Her close friends don’t like me (which is fine) but what’s not fine is that their reason for not liking me is based on my ex best friend’s opinion of me. I know I can’t please everyone but not liking someone based on someone else’s opinion is absolute rubbish.

What I learnt most from travelling with my best friend is that I didn’t know what this girl REALLY was like at all. If you are planning on taking a trip with your bestie, please either think of a good way to overcome any differences that isn’t just leaving each other alone for a bit (C O M M U N I C A T I O N!!!) and simply think whether you can do it without wanting to rip each other’s heads off (to put it lightly).

I hope this post gives people a bit of help and guidance in whether or not travelling with their best friend would suit your personalities and whether you should do it in general. I know I looked at posts about travelling with your best friend before I went and I wish I had listened to them so if you read this and ignore it anyway, I know how you feel!

Hope everyone has a lovely day and safe travels xx

KathrynIMG_1614

(Mykonos, 2017)

Update on Me and Uni

Hello everyone!

This blog began when I started university and I needed to blog as it was a part of the curriculum. Now, 3 years on and I graduated officially last Tuesday! I graduated with a Bachelor of Communications & Media Studies with a major in Marketing & Advertising (what a mouthful!).

I’m the youngest in the family (Not technically as I have a twin sister and she was born after me, but we both share the role of being the youngest), I am however the first amongst my cousins and siblings to graduate from University. As you can imagine, my parents were very proud of me. It’s been a very big week for me, my twin came down to watch me graduate and so did my big sister. My twin is definitely one of the biggest supports in my life and has always backed my decisions no matter how ridiculous or huge.

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My boyfriend Mitch of course has been an absolute angel the whole time we’ve been together and I’ve been at uni. We met midway through my second year (also his second year) and we of course have both tried to help each other through the back end of our degrees.

He was able to help me more only because he did a Bachelor of Business with majors in International Business and Accounting and while I could help with his International Business subjects, I wasn’t much help in his accounting ones because I really just suck at maths. My way of helping was mainly just making him tea while he did assignments and doing his referencing, whereas he proofread the majority of my essays and research projects.

Anyway! I thought I would talk about where I am at now, as more of an update from my first ever post introducing myself.

When I started Uni at the University of Wollongong I had my heart broken maybe a month before. My first boyfriend had dumped me and I was at a complete loss of what to do with myself. I remember trying to focus on work and picking up any and every shift I could just to keep my mind off him. Looking back now, while we have no bad blood and I am in no means trying to paint a bad picture, he didn’t treat me well. We were very young and looking back now I genuinely think he only wanted to date me so that he get past and have that first relationship. I was willing to move mountains for him when he really wouldn’t move his car for me if I asked.

I started at Wollongong Uni looking for a clean slate, no one knew how much I was hurting and I was able to paint myself the way I wanted people to see me. I fell for UOW pretty quick, even when I hated my time studying at uni, I loved every second.

In my mid year break in my second year I went on a europe trip with my best friend. I love travelling and loved that trip as I met so many fantastic people, a lot of who I still talk to (not the previously mentioned best friend though). I came home and a week later I went to my (ex) best friend’s boyfriend’s 21st, where I met my now boyfriend.

I would like to say that it is an absolute breath of fresh air being with someone who would do anything to keep a smile on your face. I felt more wanted in the space of 2 months than I did in the year I was with my ex.

I think what I’ve learned in my time at uni is to never doubt my worth, both in work and relationships. I wish I had learned this ages ago as I wouldn’t have been with my ex for so long. At least it didn’t take me very long to get over!

Focus on self improvement and self betterment than trying to boost someone else’s confidence.

 

 

My (very minor) existential crisis

Hi Everyone,

Recently I received feedback from an interview that I had had for a media assistant position and although I had applied for it a while ago and I had gotten another job offer, I still went for the interview. The two girls that interviewed me were lovely, I was late due to train issues and that I was going into the heart of Sydney straight from where I work (about an hour away) but they were fine with it. I think because of my train mishap I was already quite flustered and stressed when I entered the interview.

Anyway, I wont bore you with the details. The interview ended and they told me that they would let me know on Friday if I got the job, they did however mention that they had an important lunch on Friday too so I wasn’t sure it was definitely going to be Friday. I sent a follow up email (employers love this, it shows determination) and part of me knew that I hadn’t gotten the job, which is fine. In my follow up email I asked for feedback, which I believe is important because you can sit through a thousand interviews and get rejected a thousand times but if you don’t ask for feedback, when are you going to get the offer?

Her response hit me a lot harder than I thought it was if I’m honest. She was very lovely!! But she did say I lacked confidence and that it was something that needed to be worked on if I was to thrive in the industry (marketing). I’m honestly quite an outspoken person and am not shy when it comes to making friends but boy does that change in a work environment.

When I first start at any job, I am nauseatingly shy. It takes me about 3 weeks to a month to warm up to everyone and honestly the change is generally overnight. One day I’ll be silent and focused on working and the next I’ll be chatting to everyone, engaging in some banter and looking very comfortable (Pretty bloody different hey!).

I’m trying to figure out how I can combat this social anxiety, I know it has to do with confidence and I often watch others and see how confident they are in their jobs and how they carry themselves. I’ve recently been trying the whole ‘Fake it ’til you make it’ tactic in that I just pretend to be confident in what I’m saying and I’m hoping that I’ll just get to the point that I won’t be pretending anymore.

My boyfriend tells me that I need to pretend I have the same amount of confidence as him (easier said than done as he is very confident). But I’ve decided that I need to believe in my ability more, as if I don’t believe in my ability to do a job than why would anyone else?

Sorry for the weird existential crisis post but I think this post was very much something I needed to get off my chest.

Hope everyone has a happy day xx

Kathryn

PS. If you interview for a job ALWAYS send a follow up email! They love it and it puts you that little bit ahead as it shows how keen you are xx

Belated International Womens Day

So, International Women’s Day was last Friday and the reason I hadn’t acknowledged it was because it was also my birthday so I had the obligatory birthday celebrations to take part in. For my birthday I ended up going to a concert at Taronga Zoo which was nothing short of amazing. I don’t know what it is about being able to listen to some live music, whilst sitting on a picnic blanket with your closest friends, drinking wine and eating cheese but it was a great way to spend my birthday.

It was also hard for me, because I’m a twin and it was my first birthday not spent with my sister. I told my boyfriend I didn’t want happy birthday sung to me because it felt wrong not having my sister there with me, of which he complied and instead got me to sing ’22’ by Taylor Swift at karaoke following the concert.

Anyway, enough of my birthday, lets talk about women’s day!

All day on the Friday I really wanted to write a post in tribute to my sister, as she inspires me to be the best that I can be, so here it is.

Having a twin is hands down the best thing ever as you’re essentially handed a best friend for life. Sure, when you’re growing up you say that someone else is your best friend but you both know it’s each other.

She has consistently taught me to be more caring towards others and to fight for what I believe in. She always stood up for me and continues to do so and she carries herself in a way that only she knows how. She makes me want to be a better person for her and always knows how to pick me up when I’m down. She’ll do anything for the people she loves, including move hours away with her fiancee meaning she was moving away from her friends and family. My sister motivates, she doesn’t put other girls down.

For my belated International Women’s Day I want to be more like my twin sister and hope that I can have as big a heart as she does.

Born together, best friends forever.

Who’s your role model?

Kathryn xx

 

Has she snapped?

In the preparation of getting ready to graduate (and getting my life together) I’ve decided that life really finds a way of guiding you to where you need to go and what you need to do. All of those who read my posts would definitely know I’ve been a little on edge with trying to get myself a graduate role and how much I want to find the right place for me.

What I’ve decided is that the right place for me at this moment is where I am currently. I’ve decided I need to have a bit of a relax from pushing myself to getting the best possible job for myself and that I should accept that I will land myself the job I want eventually and I should just calm down. I’m constantly being told that I need to be kinder to myself and that I need to just CHILL.

If anyone had told me to just ‘chill’ during my uni degree I honestly would tell them to get stuffed (with more passionate words). And as someone who has always stressed about everything that I can and can’t control, as someone who literally worries and stresses so much she gives herself stress rashes and tonsillitis (yeah, I know) I’m finally understanding the importance of ‘just chill’.

While I’m still learning exactly HOW to chill out, I’ve taken a first (quite large) step by booking an overseas trip with my boyfriend and his family.

Cheers to chilling out my dudes.

-Kathryn

P.S. Yeah, I think she’s finally snapped.

Post Uni Life

“So, what are you gonna do now?”

As if that’s not the most annoying question to be asked after finishing any form of study. I want to be able to say “Well of course I’m looking for full time work. Hopefully it will be paid, but realistically I’ll probably work a part time internship that is unpaid for 6 months to a year which will leave me at my hospitality job for longer than I had wanted. This will then land me a job that still won’t pay me enough to start paying off my HECS debt, which will mean I wont be able to afford a house, which will mean I’ll still live 20 minutes from anywhere with my parents (which I don’t hate). But for now hospitality will do”.

But instead I respond, “Hopefully find a full time job, but at the moment I’m still working casually”.

Now that that’s over, I’ll get to the point of this blog post.

Finishing a university degree has to be the most satisfying thing I have ever done. However looking for work afterwards, is not. I find that looking for work or work experience after finishing a university nearly IMPOSSIBLE. Due to the fact that employers either don’t understand what entry levels jobs are or that they don’t understand how much experience a university student can actually acquire after 3 years full time study.

Why is it that we go to university to get a good job, but that proves to be very difficult as soon as you get a degree?

Personally, I think there should be a new level of work introduced for employers; Post Entry-Level, so that those who haven’t done an internship or those who don’t quite have the amount of experience that the employer is after can recognise that they wont be considered and don’t have to waste their time (Just a thought).

One thing that needs to be stressed more in university is that it isn’t about what you know, but who you know (and yet here I am, looking up tips to boost confidence for job interviews). Majority of the time if you have managed to maintain a distinction average throughout your whole degree, odds are the employer won’t look at that and pretty much just see that you have a degree (and yet that isn’t enough some times). 

As an aspiring marketer nothing frustrates me more looking for entry level jobs (specified entry level jobs on LinkedIn) to find that I need “2 years experience in a similar role”. Here’s a question for the employers; How do you propose we get this experience? Whilst also passing uni? Whilst also maintaining a healthy social life? Whilst also drinking enough water? It’s next to impossible, the only reason I’m not saying it is impossible because someone must have done this otherwise you all wouldn’t be asking for it (I guess?).

I guess all i’m trying to say is I know looking for a job is hard and I am willing to put in the hard work in order to get my foot in the door, but the idea that university students should be able to find work after getting a degree is flawed.

I’m sorry that my comeback post was somewhat negative, I’ve been waiting for inspiration to strike and it came in the form of a rant.

I’ll be posting more often now hopefully!

Kathryn xx

The Truth of Curiosity

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Growing up, I had always used the word ‘curiosity’ and ‘curious’ to get answers from anyone and everyone. Whether it was to my mother, wondering what was for dinner or whether it was a vague yet random question to one of my peers or teachers, completely unrelated to the topic being discussed. In saying this, I am not one to try new and different foods to aid curiosity. I have always been a curious person, I just always manage to showcase different levels of curiosity when it comes to certain things. If you were to ask me what makes me curious before I started my degree, I’d respond with something vague like ‘Not knowing whether or not dogs know that they are dogs’. However, now being in the middle of my degree I am able to explore the depths of my curiosity further as more and more questions are being put forward to me.

Last semester, one of my lecturers stated ‘The truth is subjective until proven absolute’. I believe that this statement has stuck in my mind as it wants me to satisfy my curiosity which means fully understanding subjective and absolute truths. There is an issue with this however, when studying a degree that involves many different theories, it is solely up to your own mind and conscience on which theory you want to believe. Whether it be Sigmund Freud’s ‘Psyche’ theory based around the human mind and body’s ‘Conscious, preconcsious and unconscious’ responses and instincts or whether it be the philosophies about art such as the epicurean and educational. These all depend on the beliefs and morals of each individual.

I believe that curiosity drives many to wanting to know more things about the world and to want to discover new things. That’s why i think many people travel, they’re curious about what the world has to offer. For someone to not feel curiosity on a daily basis is to not strive for more knowledge.